An Actual Headline

Phade · Post by **Phade** » Sat May 31, 2003 5:29 pm

KILLER BISCUITS WANTED FOR ATTEMPTED MURDER
( the actual AP headline)

Linda Burnett,23,a resident of San Diego,was visiting her in-laws and while they went to a nearby supermarket to pick up some groceries several people noticed her sitting in her car with the windows rolled up and her eyes closed,with both hands behind the back of her head.
One customer who had been at the store for a while became concerned and walked over to the car. He noticed that Linda's eyes were now open,and she looked very strange.He asked her if she was okay,and Linda replied that she had been shot in the back of the head,and had been holding her brain in for over an hour. The man called the paramedics,who broke into the car because the doors were locked and Linda refused to remove her hands from her head.When they finally got in,they found that Linda had a wad of bread stuck to the back of her head.A Pillsbury biscuit canister had exploded from the heat,making a loud noise that sounded like a gun shot,and the wad of dough hit her in the back of her head.When she reached back to find out what it was,she felt the dough and thought it was her brains. She initially passed out,but quickly recovered and tried to hold her brains in for over an hour until someone noticed and came to her aid.

And,yes,Linda is a blonde.

Fiction · Post by **Fiction** » Sat May 31, 2003 5:57 pm

HAHAHAHA Thats awsome.

Crotti · Post by **Crotti** » Sun Jun 01, 2003 1:05 pm

lol

Jack_Able · Post by **Jack_Able** » Sun Jun 01, 2003 7:52 pm

OMG thats funny.
So she is blonde - and her last name is what?
Thats funny too.

Culticon · Post by **Culticon** » Sun Jun 01, 2003 8:33 pm

Sounds like something my mom would do

LitlPrincess · Post by **LitlPrincess** » Sun Jun 01, 2003 9:20 pm

Fortunately for this woman, this is not real.

http://www.snopes.com/crime/safety/biscuit.htm

Druhsk · Post by **Druhsk** » Mon Jun 02, 2003 4:41 pm

Lol, Litl beat me to that one . . .