Its funny cause its true

Stephlon · Post by **Stephlon** » Fri Feb 17, 2006 2:38 pm

I normally dont do this sort of thing but I was laughing so hard it made me cry. Hope ya'll enjoy it as well

HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.

Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.

Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.

Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint-conditioner.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. Rinse conditioner off hair.

Shave armpits and legs.

Turn off shower.

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

Spray mold spots with Tilex.

Get out of shower.

Dry with a towel the size of a small country.

Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom.

If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo- woo sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror admiring the size of your wiener and scratch your ass.

Get in the shower.

Wash your face.

Wash your armpits.

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs sticking on the soap.

Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

Pee.

Rinse off and get out of shower.

Partially dry off.

Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.

Admire wiener size in mirror again.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.

Throw wet towel on bed.

If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. Have a great day! Oh, and...woo-woo!

thunderblade · Post by **thunderblade** » Fri Feb 17, 2006 3:30 pm

lol read it before but always makes me laugh

Post by **Panzerfaust** » Fri Feb 17, 2006 3:31 pm

I have read this one before and it still makes me laugh. When I read it to my wife, I almost never make it all the way through without laughing.

Phade · Post by **Phade** » Sat Feb 18, 2006 5:22 am

Woo Woo!

Trekman · Post by **Trekman** » Mon Feb 20, 2006 4:35 pm

Related trivia :

What does "wiener" really mean and where does it come from ?

Post by **Panzerfaust** » Mon Feb 20, 2006 6:11 pm

from wurst?

I thought it was from Vienna.

Laseirna · Post by **Laseirna** » Tue Feb 21, 2006 4:20 am

I noticed on the guy's shower it didn't say

"Wash your butt with ginger nut and jaffa cake soap, leaving those coarse butt hairs sticking on the soap."

But then I realized that's why us women use body wash!! So we don't have those ugly butt hairs in our stuff!

lightninggod2 · Post by **lightninggod2** » Fri Feb 24, 2006 2:26 am

im a man but i dont shower like that... well almost tho.

I dont Pee in the tub.

Stephlon · Post by **Stephlon** » Fri Feb 24, 2006 8:13 pm

Shower drains are MADE for pee...and sometimes foodstuffs. why waste water on a flush when you can be envoleped in the hot steamy goodness of the shower and your own pee?

Post by **Panzerfaust** » Fri Feb 24, 2006 9:03 pm

The world is my urinal!